Tuesday, 21 May 2019

How to love yourself


There are many books and courses that encourage us to love ourselves. This is a wonderful shift in human consciousness.
Still, on a practical level how do we do this successfully? In my case, I used numerous strategies in an attempt to change my consciousness.

After badmouthing myself for decades, I listened to my take on life and shut down all the bad talk. If I said a negative or disparaging comment regarding who I was, I immediately acknowledged it, and stopped letting it manifest.

Every day, I listed all my good points in my head. I did ten of them at a time. The next day, I listed ten new ones. This became a method of self-talk. I also used Emotional Freedom Tapping (EFT) to remove outdated messages that I had been playing over and over in my head. If you are interested in EFT, you can find a lot of information about it on the Internet.
A practical exercise I did was making myself stand in front of the mirror and telling myself that I loved all of me, including the parts I wrestled with. Of all the modalities I used, this one brought up the most emotion. Frequently, until I filled up my self-love bucket, I would simply stand there crying and sometimes, I was unable to speak. During these moments, I realized how amazing the process was, and how much I needed to do it repeatedly.

In addition, I wrote lists of all my gifts and accomplishments and read them aloud. There is something quite phenomenal about voicing your thoughts and feelings. Somehow, it takes the healing to another place. If you then read out your list to another person, the impact is greater. The healing we gain from this simple process is much more than we know.
In reinventing the new me, I decided to surround myself only with people who nurtured me. Those who could not, I avoided or stood up to. In the situations where I could do neither, I chose to take their awful comments and symbolically throw their words into the fire.
Looking after who we are is self-love, and keeping negativity at bay is a good decision.

Anyone who tries to sow the seed of doubt in you or withholds their support is not giving you love. Normally, these souls have little self-love and may find it almost impossible to give love to anyone, and that will include you.
I focused on looking after my body, mind, and soul. With that decision, my self-love increased and instead of berating and punishing myself, I showered myself in self-love. In addition, eating well, exercising, keeping mentally active, having social and solitary time, and generally being the best parent and friend to myself paid dividends.

As I continued to work on the areas I wished to improve, I came from a loving angle, encouraging and praising myself and getting rid of any form of self-loathing or self-punishment.
On a spiritual level, I filled my body with love and asked to be guided in this wondrous journey. I read books that inspired me, talked to wise souls and stopped negatively comparing who I was with other people.

This shift took concentrated work yet all the time, I knew it was doing me good. Initially, it was hard to see the changes. Gradually, they appeared.
All these steps have brought me to a place where I can truthfully say that I love who I am. This has been a massive achievement, especially considering where I began.
Everyone can attain self-love. With daily practise and single focus, someone who dislikes themselves can change their entire life.
When we learn this lesson in love, it transfers into everything else. Being in a state of self-love, our capacity to love everybody and everything in the world is heightened.
Use my methods, use your methods, and keep working towards a new loving life. One of the greatest accomplishments humans can do is to embrace who they are and live in self-love.


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